Eating breakfast with a Vulture

Eating breakfast with a Vulture

Our road trip began with an early morning breakfast buffet, and I was so excited. Breakfasts are my favourite meal of the day. The hotel was stunning and the food looked amazing! I was ready! I had won a voucher for breakfast for 2 and so glad I was not doing “Dinner for One”

On arrival they had reserved our seats, but we asked to move to another table as we were placed in between two tables, and wanted some space to move and chat. The Head Vulture had no problem with our move, even though it seemed to cause her a little bit of stress. At the entrance to the Restaurant she had remembered I had phoned to book and that it was a voucher, so there was no need for me to pay. I had the voucher with me to give once I was ready to leave, well that is what I thought would be the procedure…..

Within a few minutes Head Vulture arrived being very sorry to bother us, but wanted to know if we wanted some coffee, which we gladly accepted. We inhaled the bold aromas of the filter coffee and slowly sipped it as it bounced off our mouths.

I started with fruit, yoghurts and honey….my favourite part of the breakfast. Simple yet refreshing! We slowly started to relax and take in the aromas of the dining area into our nostrils, anticipating what we would eat next. While I am putting a large spoonful of yoghurt into my mouth, Head Vulture arrives with the same “sorry to bother you, but I will need the voucher” I replied with a Yes, I would give it to her. I slowly look back at my spoon to finish putting the honey coated yoghurt into my mouth, when from the side of my eyes I see Head Vulture standing and waiting. I looked up with large round eyes and asked if she wanted it immediately. Yes! I moved my bowl to the centre of the table making space for my bag. I had to rummage through it to find the Breakfast voucher. I politely gave it to her, by now “I am sorry to bother you….” NOT was starting to curdle my yoghurt. I just wanted a peaceful breakfast without any bother!

We saw another patron walk in and immediately Head Vulture was doing the tribal dance, greeting and dancing around him. Again we heard her say those dreadful words: “I am sorry to bother you…”  A while later we watch her go back to the Gentleman whom we have gathered is a long-time client – possibly a Summer Swallow who comes to enjoy the Africa sun with “I am sorry to bother you, but you seem to be troubled. Are you upset?” With this comment Swallow was  immediately embarrassed (and we think that now he was really upset and troubled by Head Vulture’s comment) and loudly answered her back that he had no reason to be upset or moody as he was on holiday! I am sure this left a bad taste in his mouth.

We watched as Head Vulture flew from one table to the next with the same “sorry to bother you…” and then once you have replied to her, she didn’t move but stood there as if the reply was not enough! It was quite funny as our mind and eyes were following the Vulture instead of the breakfast table. What started off with holiday makers coming to breakfast in a good mood was now beginning to create an unpleasant rumble, as we watched the people’s faces turn from happiness to irritation at her constant “ sorry to bother you” and then never leaving.

As we now had moved from cold buffer to the hot breakfast, Head Vulture once again swooped down on us with “I am sorry if it seems like I am bothering you.” We could not believe it….she does not give up. Head Vulture will have the last say. It felt like Head Vulture was sitting on a lamp post and I was the jackal trying to get the meat from the carcass before the Vulture jumped on me.

A while later Swallow went to get his regular toast to find that the butter needed to be replaced, he informed Head Vulture. And this was the part that I enjoyed watching the most, as Head Vulture was in charge of the Dining Area and had to keep a watchful eye on the patrons, she ducked and dived behind the bread counter scrounging for butter portions in the cupboards. We just saw her head bounce up and down with one hand on the counter and the other opening doors and drawers looking for more butter. This seemed to ruffle her feathers and finally she got hold of another Waitress to go and get more butters.

We watched Head Vulture all morning while trying to save our bacon. I must admit eating breakfast with a Vulture is not fun or relaxing! To be honest this position does not suit her personality, she needs to get into the Laundry Room where she has no-one to bother, but her-self.

By the time we left we felt like stressed Cormorants ready to regurgitate our breakfast!

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